In a breathtaking display of political acrobatics, Sir Keir Starmer has once again found himself caught in a web of his own making, desperately trying to untangle a sticky situation with his deputy, Angela Rayner. Following her admission of underpaying stamp duty on a property, Starmer’s initial reaction was a masterclass in indecision. He backed her, then his office refused to say when he knew about it, then he lavishly praised her “courage” and “integrity” for referring herself to an ethics adviser, all while his own party whispered about his famous ruthlessness. It’s a classic Starmer manoeuvre: a perfectly choreographed dance of “I support you” followed by “but also, I’m waiting to see if you get thrown under a bus.” The whole saga has the political world on tenterhooks, less concerned with the tax implications and more with whether Sir Keir will, for once, stick to a single, unwavering position for more than 24 hours.
Meanwhile, the Prime Minister has also been busy reshuffling his Downing Street team, a move that insiders have described as a noble attempt to get “the levers of government” to actually do something. It seems Sir Keir, having inherited a machine that he didn’t build, is now discovering that the ‘on’ switch is a complex series of booby traps and the ‘off’ switch is a polite note to a civil servant who is currently on holiday. The latest appointments, including a new “chief secretary to the prime minister” and a new comms director, are meant to streamline things. We can only assume this means Starmer will now have a dedicated minister for holding his hand while he tries to decide whether to turn left or right at the end of a corridor, and a comms guru whose sole job is to translate his indecisive mutterings into something resembling a coherent policy.
In a final act of political theatre, Starmer has also found time to wade into the ongoing culture war, with his allies and the wider media engaging in a fiery debate about free speech in the UK. This follows Boris Johnson’s recent public criticism of the government’s approach. While the former Prime Minister rants about the “slow-motion disaster” of free speech, Starmer has remained true to form, adopting a position so carefully calibrated and nuanced that it’s essentially invisible. It’s a position that says, “I am deeply concerned about the issue of free speech and will therefore wait to see which way the wind blows before offering a definitive opinion.” It’s an approach that avoids alienating anyone, but also leaves everyone wondering if the Prime Minister actually stands for anything at all.
Kierless Whispers 